


The Dorms On Floor Two

by made_of_tea



Category: IT (Movies - Muschietti), IT - Stephen King
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Alternate Universe - No Pennywise (IT), F/M, Gay Eddie Kaspbrak, Gay Richie Tozier, Homophobia, Internalized Homophobia, M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-06-24
Updated: 2020-07-08
Packaged: 2021-03-04 04:42:10
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 5,566
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24897874
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/made_of_tea/pseuds/made_of_tea
Summary: On the couch, a girl with short red hair wearing a crop top was talking to the cutest boy Richie had ever seen and a boy with dark skin and a kind smile. Another girl with glasses and shoulder-length hair came up to them, handing them each drinks.Richie and Stan go to college. Richie falls for a straight boy who is dating the RA, Myra, who Richie hates. And he can't avoid the couple either, because they all live on floor two.
Relationships: Ben Hanscom/Beverly Marsh, Bill Denbrough/Mike Hanlon, Eddie Kaspbrak/Richie Tozier, Patricia Blum Uris/Stanley Uris
Comments: 16
Kudos: 29





	1. Richie

Richie squeezed his Capri-Sun pouch as he drank the last drops of fruit punch from it. He tossed the crumpled pouch into the trash, narrowly missing and hitting Stan’s arm. Stan glared at him and put the pouch in the trash. 

“Don't you need to unpack?” Stan said, turning back to his laptop. 

“I did that.” 

“Last time I checked, throwing your stuff on the floor does not count as unpacking,” Stan said, fingers flying over his keyboard. 

Richie stared at the slightly faded bi pride flag sticker on Stan’s laptop. “It does for me. Have you met any of the neighbors?” 

A few days ago, Richie and Stan had become roommates. They’d known each other since middle school and had been practically inseparable ever since. In the last week of senior year, they found out they had been accepted to the same college and had immediately requested to be roommates. 

The dorm building was similar to an apartment building. Each floor had six rooms, boys on one side of the hallway and girls on the other. They were on floor two. 

Stan and Richie were in the middle dorm on the boys’ side. The only person they had met so far was the RA, a girl named Myra who lived in the girls’ dorm right near the stairs. Richie hadn't liked her. 

“No, I haven't met any of the neighbors. Myra said she was hosting a floor party this evening though, so we should probably stop by,” Stan said. 

“Sweet.” 

Stan glanced at the clock on their microwave. “It starts in twenty minutes.” 

“And you're just telling me now?!” Richie hopped up and put on his Southern belle accent, “I haven't the time to get ready! What's a girl like me to do?” 

“It takes you two minutes to get changed, chill.” 

Richie rolled his eyes and ran to his room. He put on skinny jeans and his most obnoxious Hawaiian shirt. When he came back to the kitchen, Stan was wearing his jean jacket with embroidered flowers on the pockets. 

“Ready?” 

“Let’s go.” 

They left the dorm and headed over to Myra’s room. Most of the floor was already there and music was playing from a stereo in the corner. 

On the couch, a girl with short red hair wearing a crop top was talking to the cutest boy Richie had ever seen and a boy with dark skin and a kind smile. Another girl with glasses and shoulder-length hair came up to them, handing them each drinks. 

In the kitchen, Myra was talking with her roommate, Greta, and the two girls that lived in the next dorm over. A shy-looking boy stood by himself near the door. 

Stan headed straight for him. He always hung out with people who looked uncomfortable at parties. Richie followed along. 

“Hi, I'm Stanley,” Stan introduced himself. 

“I'm Ben,” the boy said. He turned to Richie, “And you are?” 

“Richie Tozier, nice to meet ya,” Richie said, shooting finger guns. 

“Where’s your roommate?” Stan asked. 

“He had to call his little brother. He should be here soon.” Ben sipped his drink. 

Just then, a boy wearing a flannel and jorts walked in and made a beeline for Ben, hugging him tight.

“Hi, Bill. How’s Georgie?” 

“F-f-fine.” 

Ben gave them an apologetic look. “Could you give us a minute?” 

Stan nodded and dragged Richie away. He walked them over to Myra and the other girls. 

“Hey, Stan!” Myra said cheerfully. Then, less cheerfully, “Richie.” 

“Wassup, Myra?” Richie said, winking at her. She grimaced and turned away from him. 

“Would you like me to introduce you to everyone?” Myra asked Stan.

“Sure! We met Ben and briefly Bill,” Stan said. 

Myra smiled. She gestured to the girls next to her as she introduced them. “This is Greta, my roommate. That is Audra, she lives next door. And that's Audra’s roommate Ella.” 

“Nice to meet you, ladies. Richie Tozier.” Richie stuck out his hand for each of them to shake. 

Stan smiled at them and said, “I'm Stanley Uris. I apologize in advance for any awful jokes Richie will make tonight.” 

“You have such little faith in me. Some people might find my jokes funny,” Richie said. 

“Let me know when that happens so I can ask them how you bribed them,” Stan said. 

Richie laughed and slung his arm around Stan’s shoulders. 

“Are you two dating?” Audra asked with a curious smile. Myra tensed beside her. 

Stan snorted and said, “No, definitely not.” 

“I couldn't get Stan in a million years. Way out of my league,” Richie said with a grin. 

“That and you're not my type,” Stan said. 

“Not into guys?” Greta asked. 

“No, I'm bi. Richie’s just… Richie.” 

Richie nodded in agreement. “My nickname is Trashmouth.” 

Myra decided to change the subject. “Why don't I introduce you to the others?” 

Stan and Richie followed her over to the group by the couch. 

“Ooh, new people! I'm Beverly Marsh,” the redheaded girl stuck out her hand. As Richie shook it, she said, “Your shirt is atrocious. I love it.” 

“Thank you very much,” Richie said in his Elvis voice. 

The girl with glasses laughed and said, “I'm Patty Blum. Nice to meet you.” 

Richie caught the way Stan stared at her for just a second too long. 

Myra sat down next to the cute boy, flipping her hair over her shoulder. “This is Eddie. My boyfriend.” 

The boy smiled uncomfortably. An awkward silence hung over the group. The other boy decided to break it by introducing himself. 

“I'm Mike. I'm Eddie’s roommate.” 

“Nice to meet ya, Mike,” Richie said, sticking his hand out. Mike shook it firmly. 

“Do you know anything about the guy wearing jorts over there?” Mike asked, subtly pointing at Bill. 

“His name’s Bill. Other than that, no fucking clue,” Richie said. 

“And who’s his friend?” Beverly asked, staring at Ben. 

“Ben.” 

“Let's go, Mike,” Beverly said. 

Mike smiled and followed her over to the two boys.

Patty sighed. “And I've been abandoned once again. I'm gonna get another drink. Anyone want anything?” 

“I'll come with you,” Stan said. They walked off to the kitchen together, leaving Richie alone with Myra and her boyfriend. 

Richie assumed Eddie would be just as bad as Myra, since they apparently were dating. Which was be a shame, since Eddie was absolutely adorable. 

“That's it!” Eddie exclaimed. 

“What?” Richie asked. 

“I just figured out how I know you. You have a green Saturn, right?” Eddie asked, smiling. 

“How do you know what kind of car I drive?” Richie was slightly freaked out. 

“I saw you trip while getting out of the car yesterday,” Eddie said. 

“Wow. And I thought no one saw that,” Richie said. 

“Well, you were wrong,” Eddie said. 

“Shocking that Richie was wrong about something,” Myra muttered. Eddie raised an eyebrow. 

Richie smiled. “You’ve known me for less than twenty four hours, Myra.” 

Myra just rolled her eyes. “I don't have to know you to know that you’re a bad person.” 

“Well I'm sorry my existence offends you, but you really can't change that, can you?” Richie said. 

Eddie looked uncomfortable. He muttered sharply, “ _Myra._ ” 

She glanced at him and pursed her lips. “I'm going to make my rounds. Best to chat with everyone.” She got up and walked away. 

“Why are you dating her?” Richie asked. 

“Just because you dislike her doesn't mean everyone dislikes her,” Eddie snapped. 

“No, it's not that. You just seem uncomfortable,” Richie said. 

“I'm not. Myra and I have been happily dating for two years. Now, I would appreciate it if you didn't bring this up again,” Eddie said. 

RIchie didn't have the chance to respond because Stan and Patty were coming back their way. 

“Okay, but have you listened to the Allman Brothers?” Patty asked as they walked over, drinks in hand. 

“Yes! I love the song _Melissa_ ,” Stan said. 

“Oh, yeah, I love their album _Eat a Peach_ ,” Eddie said as they sat down. 

They continued talking for quite a while. Myra popped in and out of the conversation to talk to Eddie. 

Eventually, Myra sent them all back to their rooms. 

“Well, I shall see you another time, Eddie Spaghetti,” Richie said, bowing dramatically. 

Eddie rolled his eyes. “Sure.” 

Richie laughed and crossed the hall to his room with Stan. Once they were inside, Stan said, “Fuck me.” 

“No, thank you,” Richie replied. 

“I wasn't talking about you, dipshit,” Stan said, sitting down on the couch and folding his legs up to his chest. 

“Who are you talking about, then?” Richie asked, sitting next to him. 

“Patty.” Stan closed his eyes and tilted his head towards the ceiling. 

“Ah, yes. I saw you making eyes at her. You’ll be married by next week, I presume?” Richie teased. 

“Shut up. Besides, you were flirting with Myra’s boyfriend all night,” Stan pointed out. 

“I really tried not to. But he’s so damn cute.” 

“I'm gonna head to bed. Nine AM Gender Studies,” Stan said. He got up and walked to his room, closing the door behind him. 

Richie went to his room as well, falling asleep almost immediately. 

In the morning, Stan woke Richie up with the promise of coffee before class. Richie begrudgingly rolled out of bed and got dressed, putting on a shirt that said, “Women want me, fish fear me.” 

Stan drove to the on-campus coffee shop. He went in and came back out with two iced coffees. Richie took his gratefully, taking a long sip. 

“Just what I needed. I don't know why I let you talk me into a nine AM class,” Richie complained. 

“It's really not that early. And it's only twice a week,” Stan said, starting the car and driving toward their building. 

They walked into the class, which was pretty empty. There were about seven other students there and four of them Richie already knew. 

Stan made a beeline for Patty, taking the empty seat next to her. On her other side sat Bev, next to Bev was Mike and next to him, Bill. Richie sat next to Stan. 

“I didn't know you all took this class,” Stan said. 

“Yeah. Bev, Mike and I signed up for it together. We wanted at least one class all together. We really tried to convince Eddie, but he said no,” Patty said. 

“Absolute hetero bullshit,” Bev commented. 

“I d-didn't know they w-would be here,” Bill said. 

“You don't have to hang out with us Bill,” Bev teased. 

“It's n-not that! I just d-didn't know,” Bill said. 

The professor walked in then, silencing them. She introduced herself as Professor Bhat and handed out the syllabus and such. The class was boring, as all first-day classes are. After class, they all went their separate ways across campus. 

Richie’s next class was English Lit, so he made his way over to the humanities building. 

In the class, he spotted Eddie. Richie sat down next to him, dropping his bag on the floor. 

“Oh, you're in this class,” Eddie said with a frown. 

“You're just elated to see me, aren't you?” Richie asked. 

Eddie rolled his eyes. “More like disappointed.” 

“You can let yourself think that. You’ll fall in love with me eventually,” Richie said. 

Eddie glared at him. “No, I won't. I'm straight.” 

“Mhm,” Richie hummed. 

The discussion was over at that because the professor had walked in. 

After class, Richie offered to walk Eddie back to the dorms. 

“Fine,” Eddie begrudgingly accepted. 

As they started walking, Richie asked, “How well do you know Patty?” 

“Extremely well. We’ve been friends for years,” Eddie said. “Why? Are you interested in her?” 

“No way. I'm gay. Homosexual. No, my friend Stan is interested. Could you see if she’s interested?” Richie said. 

“I guess.” 

They continued walking in silence until they got to their floor. 

“Well, I shall see you soon, Eddie Spaghetti. Toodles,” Richie said, unlocking the door to his dorm. 

“Bye,” Eddie responded. 

As soon as Richie had closed the door behind himself, he said, “Shit.” 

“What?” Stan asked from where he was laying down on the couch and reading _To Kill A Mockingbird_. 

“I'm crushing on a straight guy.” 

“Oh, honey, Eddie is not straight,” Stan said. 

“Yes, he is. He told me,” Richie insisted. 

Stan gave him a look of disbelief over his book. Richie pouted. 

“Would it make you feel better if we watched _Ferris Bueller’s Day Off_ after we do our homework?” Stan asked. 

“Yes,” Richie said, flopping down next to Stan to read over his shoulder. Stan sighed and scooted closer so Richie could see better.


	2. Eddie

Eddie sat at the kitchen table, working on a paper for English Lit. A cup of herbal tea with far too much sweetener was getting cold on the counter next to his textbooks. 

Mike was frowning at his own textbooks in the seat across from him. 

Eddie couldn't stop thinking about what Richie had said. _You'll fall in love with me eventually._ When the words had come out of Richie’s mouth, Eddie had felt a small jump in his stomach. A small burst of butterflies. 

And, of course, Eddie was overthinking it. 

“What’s bothering you, Eddie? You have that…” Mike gestured vaguely to his face, “...look.” 

“I don't want to talk about it.” 

“Myra related?” Mike asked. 

“Not this time.” Admittedly, most of Eddie’s anxiety was based around his mother and Myra. Of course, his Myra-related anxiety was just because they were dating. And he shouldn't have any more mother-related anxiety because Sonia had died a month before Eddie got accepted to college. 

Eddie was startled out of his thoughts by a knock on the door. Mike went to get it and Patty and Bev entered the dorm. 

Bev hopped up to sit on the counter and Patty leaned against it beside her. 

Eddie remembered what Richie had asked him to do. “Oh, Patty, I was talking to that annoying guy Richie who lives next door and he wanted to know if you were interested in his friend Stan.” 

Patty smiled. “Why? Is Stan interested in me?” 

“I mean, yeah, probably,” Eddie said. 

“Sweet,” Patty said. 

“Two days and you're already getting a boyfriend. They grow up so fast,” Bev said, wrapping her arms around Patty’s head in a gentle hug. 

“Shut up. He's not my boyfriend,” Patty said. 

“Yet,” Mike added. 

“Yet,” Patty repeated. 

Suddenly, they heard another knock on the door. Eddie went to get it. 

“Hello, Eddiebear! Just checking in! Did you take your allergy medicine today?” Myra asked. 

“Hi, Myra. Yes, I did. Do you want to come in?” Eddie asked. 

“Always,” Myra said, entering the room. 

Back in the kitchen, Patty checked her watch. “Oh, I totally forgot! I have an online quiz due in an hour. I'm so sorry, I have to go.” 

Bev gave Eddie a look and followed Patty out the door. 

Eddie was aware his friends did not like Myra. They never told him why and they never brought it up. Eddie had gotten used to it. Maybe one day they would tell him. 

A few days later, Eddie sat next to Richie in English Lit again. 

“What's up, spaghetti?” Richie asked as he sat down. 

“What is it with you and annoying nicknames?” Eddie asked. 

Richie shrugged. “It's just part of my charm.” 

“What charm?” 

“The charm that attracts people with a sense of humor,” Richie said. 

Eddie rolled his eyes. 

“So, Stan wanted to start a study group with your friends. Mostly so he can spend time with Patty but also so we can help each other with homework and shit. Ask your friends about it and let me know if you're in,” Richie said. 

“I'll see what they think.” 

When Eddie got back to his dorm, Bev was doing her makeup in the webcam of her laptop. Patty was sitting on the couch and tracing a pencil sketch with a thick black marker. 

Mike came down the hallway. “Hey, Eddie.” 

“Hey, Mike. I'm glad you're all here, because I had something to ask you. Richie said he and Stan wanted to start a study group with us,” Eddie said. 

“I'm in,” Patty said. 

“Can we invite those cute boys that live down the hall?” Bev asked. “Ben and Bill?” 

“I'll ask Richie,” Eddie said. He quickly texted Richie and got a response almost immediately. “He said yes.” 

“Sweet. We’re in,” Mike said. 

The next day, Eddie went over to Richie and Stan’s dorm. Patty was already there but Bev and Mike had gone to get Ben and Bill. 

“Hello, Eds!” Richie greeted him. 

“Stop it with the weird nicknames,” Eddie said. 

“I can't do that,” Richie said. 

In the kitchen, Patty and Stan were talking. Patty was looking at the stickers on Stan’s laptop. 

“You’re bi? Me too,” Patty said with a smile. 

“Really? That's cool,” Stan said. 

Richie snorted. Eddie saw Stan step on his foot under the table. 

They heard a knock on the door and Richie went to get it. Bev, Mike, Ben and Bill entered. 

“Let’s get this study party started!” Bev said. 

“You like studying?” Richie asked. 

“No. But I feel that it's good to go into it with a positive attitude,” Bev said. 

“Actually, having a positive attitude is proven to help you get things done more efficiently,” Ben said. 

“Really? I'm on the right track then,” Bev said. 

“W-we should get st-started, I have a m-meeting w-with my speech therapist at eight,” Bill said. 

They all settled in around the living room and kitchen area. Stan and Patty sat on the floor together, Ben and Bev sat on one side of the couch with Bill and Mike on the other. Richie and Eddie sat in the kitchen. 

Eddie tried his absolute best to get work done, but it was nearly impossible being near Richie. He was hyper-aware of how close they were at any given time for reasons he didn't know. 

“Shit!” Richie hissed, holding his finger. 

“What happened?” Eddie hoped the anxious tone of his voice wasn't too obvious. 

“Paper cut. Stanny, where are the band-aids? I have a boo-boo,” Richie whined. 

“Cabinet above the sink,” Stan said, not looking up from his book. 

Richie walked down the hall to the bathroom. When he came back, he had a Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles band-aid on his finger. 

“Stan, I told you to get Sponge Bob band-aids,” Richie said, frowning at his band-aid. 

“They were all out of Sponge Bob. It was either that or Barbie,” Stan said. 

“Barbie is obviously the better choice. What were you thinking?” Bev said, grinning. 

“Ninja Turtles are better. I mean, who doesn't want to stare at a turtle-human hybrid everytime they look at their finger?” Patty said. 

“See, Patty agrees with me,” Stan said. 

When Patty looked away, Richie made kissy faces at Stan. Stan flipped him off. 

“God, you're so annoying,” Eddie said. 

“I'm injured, Eds! I'm allowed to be annoying when I'm wounded,” Richie said. “If you want me to stop, you’ll have to kiss my finger and make it better!” 

Eddie put on a sickly-sweet voice and said, “Oh, you want me to kiss your boo-boo? Go fuck yourself.” 

Richie laughed and went back to his work. Eddie stared at the blank Google Doc on his laptop, trying to get himself back on track. He had been so stressed since starting college and his anxiety was making him act weird. 

“Well, I could use a snack. What do y’all want?” Bev asked, standing up from the couch. 

“I’ll come with you, I need to get away from this essay,” Eddie said, standing up as well. 

Everyone told them what snacks they wanted, then Bev and Eddie started the walk to the vending machines on the ground floor of the dorm building. 

“This virtual design assignment is kicking my ass,” Bev said. 

“Why? You're really good at virtual design,” Eddie said. 

“But I prefer to do sketches. The outfits look more natural. You know who I would love to design outfits for?” Bev said, turning to Eddie excitedly. 

“Winona Ryder?” Eddie guessed. 

“Well yes, but I was talking about Richie. His style is atrocious. I could design so many horrendous things,” Bev said. 

“I'm sure he’d love that. His style is a mixture of ‘rodeo clown’ and ‘dad on vacation in Hawaii,’” Eddie said. 

“You seem to be paying a lot of attention to Richie’s clothes,” Bev said. 

“Just because his clothes are obnoxious and I couldn't ignore them even if I wanted to,” Eddie fired back as they approached the vending machines. 

Bev smirked and started putting quarters into the machine. Once they had all the snacks, they went back to the dorm. 

“We got snacks, losers,” Bev said. She passed out bags of chips and pretzels to everyone. 

She followed Eddie over to where Richie was still in the kitchen. 

“Hey. Were Patty and Stan flirting while we were gone?” Bev asked quietly. 

“Basically undressing each other with their eyes,” Richie replied. Bev laughed. 

“You're gross,” Eddie said. 

“Don't be jelly, spaghetti,” Richie said, unwrapping the Twinkie they had brought him. 

Eddie just rolled his eyes. 

A few days later, Eddie went into his dorm to find Bev sitting on his couch and crying. He rushed over to her immediately. 

“Bev, what’s wrong?” 

Bev just pointed at the TV and said shakily, “They were in love! He was gonna become Mrs. Jackie Hyde!” 

Eddie calmed down. “Oh, you're watching That 70s Show. Again. You gotta stop doing this to yourself.” 

“It's a curse,” Bev said, pausing the show. 

“Why are you watching it in my dorm, though? I'm pretty sure you have a dorm room of your own right across the hall,” Eddie said. 

“Stan came over to do a project with Patty, so I thought I’d give them some space,” Bev explained. “Mike left when I turned on the show. His exact words were, ‘I'm not gonna watch you troture yourself with a fictional relationship again’ and then he left.” 

“Gosh, how could he say such a thing?” Eddie deadpanned. "Besides, why would you watch the end of season seven? That's the worst." 

Bev glared at him. “I only wanted to watch it because I wanted to stare at Ashton Kutcher’s beautiful face and he's so pretty in the end of season seven." 

Eddie nodded. There was just something about Ashton Kutcher that made Eddie want to watch every movie and TV show the man was in. He really was pretty. 

They heard a knock on the door. Eddie went to get it as Bev wiped any last tears from her eyes. 

“Hello, Eddiebear. You didn't call me,” Myra said. 

“Hey, Myra. I just got back and I was talking to Bev. I was about to call you,” Eddie said. He could feel Bev’s look of disbelief bruning into the back of his head. He smiled at Myra awkwardly. 

“So, can I come in?” Myra asked. 

“Yeah. We’re just watching That 70s Show, so…” Eddie said as he let Myra inside. They sat down on the couch, Eddie in between the two girls. 

“I should probably get going. Stan should be gone by now, right?” Bev said. She gathered her stuff and said goodbye before leaving the dorm. 

“I thought she’d never leave. Wanna fool around a little, Eddiebear?” Myra said, pressing against him on the couch. 

“Um, yeah, sure,” Eddie said. He hated doing anything more than kissing with Myra. He was uncomfortable the whole time. They had never gone all the way; Myra was saving herself for marriage. Eddie was completely fine with that. 

As Myra started kissing his neck, he said, “Actually, I don't feel that great. I'm gonna go lie down for a little bit. You don't have to stay unless you want to.” 

Without waiting for an answer, Eddie rushed to his room and locked the door.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry but Hyde and Jackie not ending up together in t70s is the biggest crime against television I have ever watched so I had to rant a little
> 
> anyway join us next week when Richie tries to play matchmaker for his friends


	3. Richie

“ _I'll never be your beast of burden- I walk for miles, unh, my feet are hurtin’..._ ” Richie sang along to The Rolling Stones as he danced around the kitchen making hot chocolate.

Stan walked in then, dropping his key on the small table next to the door. 

“Staniel! How is the lovely lady Patty Blum?” Richie asked. 

“She’s wonderful. We talked for three hours. Mostly about birds,” Stan said, sitting at the kitchen table. 

“She likes birds too? It’s a match made in heaven. You’re soulmates, I tell you,” Richie said. 

Stan rolled his eyes. “And how is Eddie?” 

“Straight,” Richie said with a grin. He dropped the grin after a second of Stan staring at him judgmentally. “Hey, I don't really mind that he’s straight. He just seems really cool and I want a new friend that doesn't judge my every action.” 

“I only judge you out of the kindness of my heart,” Stan said. 

Richie snorted. “You should ask Patty out to that birdwatching thing on Saturday so I don't have to go.” 

“Maybe I will. She’d be much better company,” Stan said. “You just complain about not being able to use your outside voice.” 

“Birdwatching is outside! I should be allowed to talk as loud as I want,” Richie said. 

“But you’re scaring off the birds,” Stan said. 

Richie pouted. Then he got an idea. “Wait, actually, I do want to go with you.” 

“Why?” 

“Because I want to spend time with my friend and his future wife,” Richie said. 

Really, Richie wanted to help Stan get with Patty. Stan was not one for making the first move and Richie didn't know Patty well enough to trust that she would go for it. 

“Okay,” Stan said skeptically. “I’ll ask her tomorrow if she wants to come.” 

Richie grinned. 

Saturday, Richie found himself squeezed into the backseat of Stan’s Volkswagen Jetta on the way to a birdwatching trail. Patty sat in the passenger’s seat. 

The car was silent other than the radio playing softly through the car speaker. 

Richie leaned up so he was between the two front seats. “So, Patty, what’s your favorite bird?” 

“It’s hard to choose a favorite bird. They’re all so unique and special,” Patty said, adjusting her glasses. 

“You sound like my sixth grade english teacher,” Richie said with a smile. 

Patty laughed. 

“Stan, do you have a favorite bird?” Richie asked, turning to him. 

“Probably Baltimore orioles. They’re beautiful birds,” Stan said. 

Stan and Patty talked about birds for the rest of the trip. Since Richie knew next to nothing about birds, he texted Bev and they got into a heated debate about how hot Shia Labeouf was. 

Richie and Beverly had become fast friends. After the study group, Bev had given Richie her number and they often texted each other late at night to talk about very stupid things. 

After about half an hour, Stan parked in a dirt lot next to a pristine silver Chevy. 

Patty walked over and looked at the license plate. “Oh no. This is Eddie’s car.” 

“Why is that an ‘oh no’?” Richie asked. 

“Eddie hates birdwatching. The only reason he would be here is if Myra dragged him along, meaning Myra is here,” Patty said bitterly. 

“You don't like Myra either?” Stan asked, sliding a backpack over his shoulder. 

“None of us do. She’s awful,” Patty said. 

“Why is he dating her then?” Richie asked. 

Patty shrugged. “Mike’s been trying to figure it out since they started dating. His leading theory is that Myra is a lot like Eddie’s mom and Eddie has mommy issues.” 

“I’ve got an idea. I’ll find Eddie and Myra and keep them occupied so you two can enjoy some time alone,” Richie said. 

“You’d do that for us?” Patty asked. 

“I make great sacrifices for my friends,” Richie said. “Just buy me a package of Sugar Babies later and we’ll be even.” 

“Deal,” Stan said. 

The three of them walked over to where a group was congregating near the entrance. Richie made his way over to Eddie and Myra. 

“Heyo, Eds! Wassup, Myra?” Richie greeted them. 

Myra glared at him and a look of mild relief washed over Eddie’s face. 

“What are you doing here, Richie?” Eddie asked. 

“Oh, you know. I love the outdoors,” Richie said. Then a bee buzzed in front of his face and he shrieked, backing away. 

Eddie snorted. “Uh-huh. You love the outdoors but you’re scared of bees. Makes sense.” 

“I'm allergic to bees, actually,” Richie said. 

“Don't you have other people to pester?” Myra asked. 

“Nope. You are my main pestering priority today,” Richie said. 

The guide showed up and went over bird watching etiquette or something. Richie wasn't really paying attention. He was watching Stan and Patty as they glanced at each other when the other wasn't looking. 

The hike started off pretty easy. The guide pointed out birds and they all listened for bird calls. They stopped at a small outlook with picnic tables to take a quick break. 

Richie sat with Eddie and Myra. He looked over at Stan and Patty, who were seated very close together on one side of a picnic table and sharing a bag of trail mix. 

“So, what do you like about birds?” Richie asked. 

“I don't really like nature. Allergies and disease are everywhere,” Eddie said. 

“I don't do this for the birds, I mainly do this to spend time with my Eddiebear,” Myra said. 

“Oh. Huh. If I was a bird I’d be the toucan on the Froot Loops box,” Richie said. 

“That sounds about right,” Eddie said. 

“You’d probably be Tweety Bird. Or Road Runner,” Richie said. 

Eddie snorted. “Why am I a cartoon bird?”

“You have a cartoonish aura,” Richie said. 

“Were you an aura-reader in the circus before you came here?” Myra asked. 

“Believe it or not, I wasn’t. I am just naturally skilled in aura-reading,” Richie said. 

The guide called them all back to the path and Richie had to be quiet again. Richie spent the rest of the hike staring at Eddie and trying to figure out what song was stuck in his head. 

When they got back to the parking lot, Richie said goodbye to Eddie and Myra. 

“I will see you two soon. Probably when I get back to the dorms because we live in the same place,” Richie said. 

“Well, actually we’re going out for lunch. So, you probably won't see us,” Myra said. 

“I’ll see you in English Lit tomorrow, Rich,” Eddie said. 

“Yeah. See you tomorrow, Tweety,” Richie teased. 

“Shut up,” Eddie said as he walked away in the direction of his car. Myra hung back a little. 

“Stay away from my boyfriend. I don't want your... _lifestyle_ rubbing off on him,” Myra said. 

“Suck my dick, Myra, I’ll do what I want,” Richie said. He walked away and met up with Stan and Patty. 

“Hey, Richie. How were Eddie and Myra?” Stan asked. 

“Same old, same old,” Richie said with a shrug. “How was your day?” 

Stan and Patty glanced at each other and smiled. “Pretty good,” Patty said. 

Richie grinned. “Let’s go home, I hate nature.” 

Patty got in the car, but Richie pulled Stan to the side. 

“If you don't ask her out for real by the end of the day I will drink your last Fanta,” Richie said. 

“Are you threatening me into asking out the girl I like?” Stan asked. 

“Yes,” Richie said. 

Stan rolled his eyes. “I was gonna ask her out anyway.” 

“Good.” 

They got in the car and drove back to the college. Richie made sure to walk fast so he was a few feet ahead but he could still hear them. 

He stopped outside his own dorm and watched as Stan and Patty stopped in front of her dorm. 

“I had fun today,” Patty said. 

“Me too,” Stan said. “Would you, um, want to go on an actual date with me sometime? Without Richie.” 

“I’d like that. I’ll text you,” Patty said. She kissed him on the cheek and went inside her dorm. 

Richie watched as Stan stood there with a dazed look on his face. When he walked over to Richie, he touched his hand lightly to where she had kissed his cheek. 

“You did it!” Richie congratulated him. 

“Shut up,” Stan said as he unlocked the door and went inside. 

Inside, Richie plopped down on the couch. Stan sat down next to him. 

“How was your day with Eddie?” Stan asked. 

“Good, until Myra threatened me,” Richie said. 

Stan sat up a little straighter. “What do you mean ‘threatened’? I'm not afraid to hit a girl, Richie.” 

Richie laughed. “Not like that. She was just being homophobic. Nothing I haven't dealt with before.” 

Stan frowned. “What did she say?” 

“Basically she doesn't want me hanging out with Eddie because she thinks I’ll turn him gay. I told her to suck my dick,” Richie said. 

“Of course you did. Well, if she says anything else, please tell me. I don't want another Henry Bowers incident with you,” Stan said. 

“I know. I don't want that either. I know how to handle it this time,” RIchie said. “And I promise I will come straight to you if it gets worse.”

Stan nodded. “Okay.”

“Of course, I’ll only come to you when you’re not getting pegged by Patty,” Richie teased. 

“Fuck off,” Stan said, blushing. 

“Never. You’re stuck with me for life, buddy,” Richie said. 

“I know, I know,” Stan said.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> me writing the end of this chapter: hmmm what if I gave Richie some past trauma

**Author's Note:**

> updates and sneak peaks will be posted on my Tumblr, which is fluently-sarcastic!


End file.
